“Maybe it’s not such a bad thing, Mel. I mean… I’ve talked to Lisa and she told me that she has a real problem with John’s size and… you know… when they do it, it’s actually painful for her.”
I gave my best friend Alyssa a soft smile and then took a sip of my Diet Coke. It was Saturday night and we had just come back to my house from seeing a movie.
“Well, I definitely don’t have that problem.”
We exchanged knowing grins and she spoke again.
“It just doesn’t make sense. I mean, he’s so big in every other way, you would think that part of him would just be proportional to the rest of him.”
“Well if that were true, he’d probably be dragging the ground.”
She giggled between bites of her pizza.
She was right, though, my boyfriend Michael was a behemoth. The starting middle linebacker of our high school’s football team was 6’2” and well over 220 pounds. He had everything going for him: He was a senior, incredibly popular, and it was widely known that college scouts had already been to our school’s football games to watch him play.
“You could always… you know… break up with him I guess.”
“You’d break up with a guy just because he’s… small?”
“I didn’t say that. I just meant it’s an option.”
Michael treated me wonderfully. He picked me up and drove me to school and took me home before he went to football practice. He introduced me to all of his friends and always took me out on the weekends. It made me feel guilty to even consider breaking up with him because he had a small penis.